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I Never Asked

by GRAVEL

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1.
well what goes up must come down when will I feel safe and sound? suppose I found solid ground maybe one day I'll come around I make excuses but I never lie hide my list of alibis rehearse lines one track mind well I wish the world made me sick but I found I was just born with it one long stagnant phase with a theme of vanity and pain but it's true I come from the land of fake what can I say? WHAT CAN I SAY now we're here to play much to your dismay Sometimes I feel like I could die And everything would be just fine No time for the long goodbyes Life leaves me sick and unsatisfied And sometimes I count the things I lack To give myself a heart attack I've lost something, I want it back Why can I write my own track? Hide and seek Can't find me Hide and seek Beauty queen
2.
I met a boy with dirty feet I thought he'd think the same as me But when he sees a man in the street All he sees is dust and meat When I see a man in the street I offer him a cigarette He might not be very neat but you know that he'll appreciate it What would it cost you? to put yourself inside of another person's shoes and What would it cost me? trying to make you see.... To what do what do I owe? this awkward silence To what do what do I owe? your passive violence To what do what do I owe? you going off again The only thing you know is the places you've been Why would you? How could you? What do you even do? So to the guy I never met He doesn't have the right to get To reduce you down to cloth and sweat From his place he isn't better What would it cost him? to take a step back and see that life is grim and What would it cost you? Just another day to get through. To what do what do I owe? this small endeavor To what do what do I owe? you feeling clever To what do what do I owe? your tall arrogance the only thing you know is ambivalence Where do you get these views? Come on, dude. And get a CLUE.
3.
She wants a lot but won't commit only goes out when she looks like shit ask her twice she'll throw a fit tear you up bit by bit Moody just like a cat complains about being thin then fat goes to parties just to be a brat "like, whatever. FUCK THAT" That she That she is That she is me And sometimes she'll get real chatty when her nose is full of addies got a blunt? she'll roll a fatty doesn't blame the girls for being catty She's full of hate when her stomach growls and in the morning she's quite foul if there's a moon you know she'll howl but watch your back 'cause she's on the prowl That she That she is That she is me She only loves you when you're sick she doesn't kiss but slobbers and licks she's got a dozen jaw cracking ticks she'll call you out if you're being a prick She's only fun when she's too drunk her mood is in an eternal funk she's a myth with no debunk but you know she's your FAVORITE PUNK! That she That she is That she is me That she That she is That she is me
4.
Being unconscious means I Said NO I was only sleeping just like the boys do passed out after a couple of brews I was awoken, much to my dismay some stupid fuck was trying to 'have his way' "What are you doing? How dare you offend. Aren't you supposed to be my friend?" "You made it too easy with your eyes shut. Because isn't every girl just my slut?" When I told someone they just rolled their eyes "Didn't you know that when you slept next to a guy?" WHAT THE FUCK does that mean? It doesn't make any sense Because if I'm asleep, then how the fuck can I consent? But it's not just me, it happens all the time And often dismissed as not a real crime They are told to look at me like I am an object Not a living breathing person to respect They try to press this sick mentality the messed idea: 'you know how the boys can be' It's a toxic lie that we are fed from so young That girls just exist for some boy's fun There's no excuse; there's no escape I'm not mistaken it's just fucking rape So just quit this excuse game It's our sick culture that is to blame sleep isn't consent it's not something I dreamt this violence can't be condoned my body is mine to own BOYS WON'T BE BOYS GIRLS AREN'T FUCK TOYS BOYS WON'T BE BOYS GIRLS AREN'T FUCK TOYS
5.
Burning bridges you used to get by thinking you'll find something better in the ashes. Hearing my voice, but not listening to my reply feeling better by calling me trash and you've got to learn to love yourself you've got to learn to love life if not you'll send yourself to hell i'll see you there in no time You just used up my time. So I'll pretend that I'm fine. I'm just using these lines To get this off of my mind. I never asked for your help I never needed the gift I can do it all by myself I don't need you to lift a single fucking stupid limb I know who you are I don't care where you've been I know you'll send yourself to hell I guess it's just as well. You just used up my time. I will not pretend that I am fine. I'm just using these lines. To get this off my mind. You're not what I wanted. You're not what I need. I'm just getting started. Forget about me. You just used up my time. I will not pretend that I am fine. I'm just using these lines. I may as well get this off my mind. My mind. My mind. My MIND MIND MIND MIND MIND.
6.
Fine 01:08
i'm watching someone on the train eat their own skin how far removed are we from the man who eats women it's a sick sadistic world we live in our normalcy is murdering ////////////////////////////////////////////////////// depending on the color of your skin, pigment makes you a terrorist if you're white they'll brush you off as a mental case and even if that's true? they will do nothing to help you //////////////////////////////////////////////////// They wanna take away your rights I guess these are the ends of time ////////////////////////////////////////////////// I never wanted to fall in line I was just trying not to fall apart Why do I never feel quite fine? I'm fine. I'm fine.

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recorded & mixed by : ellis hobby :)
all songs by : gravel

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released July 13, 2016

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GRAVEL Salem, Massachusetts

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